Sunday, April 5, 2009

corporate worship woes

Today I ventured out to try and find a church. One was suggested to me, and it's down the street so I thought I'd give it a try. Sadly, I must admit, I walked out about 30 minutes into it. It was overwhelming. On stage was a band consisting of every instrument known to man, a worship leader with about 8 other "lead singers", and a choir of people all clapping and singing. There were large cameras panning around the room (I assume it's broadcasted), and lights and maybe even some smoke. And I write about this experience not to judge the church or make fun of it at all, but more to try and understand why I respond so negatively to that type of worship. Is it just because I'm not used to it? Do I think I'm too good for that display? The church is excited and expressing their joy, and they aren't afraid to profess their faith in and need for Jesus, so what's so wrong with that? Is it because it makes me "feel" something and I try to avoid that? In my head, I would much rather be with people who are expressive and open than in a church where you have to be quiet, Sunday best and well behaved. It just felt cheesy. Anyway, I walked out and went to my car and cried because I couldn't understand why all I wanted to do was be as far away from there as possible, and that made me sad. What does that mean? Maybe I just miss what I'm used to, red mountain.

2 comments:

  1. We miss you down here. Hang in there Candace! Keep an open mind about church, but make sure you're still happy there. It might not be much of a solution, but it's all I know to say! Call me if there is something that I can do for you.

    Jon David

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  2. Gosh, hunting a new church is one of the things that stresses me out the most when I move to a new place. Red Mountain was one of the first churches I landed at when I moved to Birmingham, which was fortunate, but it still took me months and months to be able to say yes, this is it. (And there were lots of Sundays that I wanted to sneak out during communion, or when I called a friend beforehand and said, "YES, I really need to go to this. Don't let me turn around.") Which doesn't say much to your current situation, except that I hate that, and I know it's stressful.

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